The Impossibly Simple Secret to Achieving Greatness.
Let's face it, we are all looking to be a better version of ourselves.. That's why we go to the gym, try to eat healthy, and generally try not to die too early.
We're exploring for something better.
We read new books to learn new ideas. We entertain the arts to be more well-rounded and creative. We choose religion and some belief in a higher being to find meaning and purpose.
We want more.
And we each do it in different ways. In a way that fits who we are and what we are searching for. It's a combination of everything we are and everything we hope to be.
Another way to say this is transformation. Personal transformation.
We want to be transformed. And we know that it's a process. We know that it doesn't happen overnight.
But at times it seems it isn't happening at all.
We're not transformed.
We're doing better things but we just don't seem to be better people. We're not in a better position.
It's a vicious struggle for what we want for ourselves and the intractable obstacles that seem to get in between.
And so we're stuck -- hopelessly lost in the emotional conquest to achieve greatness. Frustrated by the lack of results from our effort and torn by a deep indecision to simply quit.
If it isn't going to work, then why keep trying?
Why keep failing?
Love changes that.
It might not seem obvious at first. Frankly, it might seem preposterous even after thinking about it. Simply unbelievable.
And that's probably an attitude to be expected. In our quest for personal achievement, we've changed the conversation from what is magical to what is manageable.
We've limited our ability to achieve by what we think is possible. And love just doesn't seem to fit into that equation.
And so we lose out on the opportunity to truly be amazing.
Love is the most powerful, most transformative power that we know.
It can do what no other attitude, attitude, or emotion can achieve.
Love can bring your dream back to life.
And that's not just high-grade motivational mumbo-jumbo.
In the laboratory, scientists have been able to see love bring dead brain matter back to life. Quite literally, the neurochemicals that are created in response to empathy and kindness, when sprinkled on dead brain cells, bring those cells back to life.
Taking this further, scientists now tell us that there is direct link between love and the health of our immune system. Love boosts our ability to heal ourselves.
There is nothing else that does this. No other transformative force is as powerful. Nothing.
And yet, we know this already.
Perhaps the scientific analysis is something you didn't know before. Perhaps the anecdotal health advantage is a novel perspective.
But deep down in our soul we know this already.
We know this because of how we feel when we're loved. We know how special, how confident, how secure, we become when others show us love.
And we know the agony of love that is torn from us. We know the deep hurt of having lost friendships, trust, and confidence.
It's a silent torment that can bring the strongest person to their knees.
We know what it's like to not be loved.
And so we spend our whole lives in search of love. That's how we're wired.
It's a subconscious longing that we all have. It's the silent motivation behind how we act and think.
Which brings up a bigger issue.
What we call love.
A lot of what we call love isn't really love at all. It's passive aggression.
See, the downside of being loved is that you can get hurt. Badly.
One of our natural defense mechanisms against getting hurt is being passive aggressive.
We invest in what looks like love but underneath it's full of trap-doors to make sure if anybody loses it's the other guy and not us.
Which creates a confused social dynamic.
You always have ten different explanations of why and how you being a loving person. But you never realize the rewards of being a loving person. You can always point to a half-dozen actions and attitudes that seem to indicate that you're a good person. But you never experience the trust and confidence that comes along with being a loving person.
In fact you find yourself becoming more insecure. More skeptical. More cynical.
And you're still stuck. Mired in half-hearted attempts at greatness without the courage to try something truly transformational. To change your situation. To love.
Love is something different.
And while it is difficult to completely define what love is, it is easier to understand when compared to passive aggression.
- Love tries to help. Passive aggression tries to look helpful.
- Love is confident. Passive aggression is cowardly.
- Love is risky. Passive aggression only wants rewards.
- Love is forgiving. Passive aggression never forgets.
- Love is meaningful. Passive aggression is manipulative.
- Love is sympathetic. Passive aggression is cynical.
- Love is tender. Passive aggression has a temper.
- Love is nurturing. Passive aggression is needy.
- Love inspires boldness. Passive aggression inspires brashness.
- Love is giving. Passive aggression is about getting.
- Love is patient. Passive aggression is petty.
The difference becomes clearer.
Passive aggression isn't just a little bit different than love. It's directly opposed.
It limits out ability to unstick ourselves. To find personal breakthrough. Since passive aggression keeps you focused on how other people think of you and how to avoid getting hurt or being held accountable for your failure, you don't just "not succeed". You force yourself into a downward struggle of helpless, hopeless finger-pointing.
Love changes that.
- Love allows you to invest in the greatness of others.
- Love allows you to connect with the suffering and desires of others.
- Love allows you to see the opportunity behind the obstacles.
- Love allows you to admit failure and forces you to keep trying.
- Love allows others to care about you and your success.
You can't replace the transformational power of love with the transaction of passive aggression.
At times they might look the same, but they drive dramatically different results. One leads to a better you and the other leads to how people talk about you right now.
If you want to achieve greatness then you need to love.
Love starts with you. You have to forgive yourself for your inadequacies. For your mistake. For your failure and fears.
You can't help others be amazing until you believe enough in yourself to expect you can do something amazing. To be incredible.
The simple secret to achieving greatness is to love.
To love others.
To love yourself.
To love what you want for yourself.